Unfinished Business
by Naomi Tilley

~*~

He sat up quickly, half startled, then smiled tiredly when he saw Zack standing there, watching him warily.

"Hey, Zack."

Zack walked slowly into the room. After nearly four days in the hospital, he had finally gathered enough courage to go and see Tommy. He hoped he had enough strength to keep a lid on his anger, and his fear. In any case, Tommy certainly looked like he was back to normal.... _whatever normal is...._

Zack felt a rush of anger, both at himself and at Tommy. Anger at himself for believing that Tommy could have hurt Jason without Zedd's spell, and anger at Tommy for having gotten away with no more than a bad headache.

_it's not his fault.... we've been over this....._ But it did nothing to take away the residue of anger that stayed in his system.

"So how're you feeling?" he asked, struggling to keep the anger out of his voice.

Tommy shrugged. "I'm okay. I've just got a really bad headache that doesn't want to go away. I wish I could remember what happened at the lookout, though."

Zack fought to keep his expression neutral. _no, you don't..._ "Don't worry about it, Tommy. You're okay. That's what matters." A heavy sigh escaped Tommy. "Yeah, that's what everyone keeps telling me. I just wish I knew what was happening with Jason. Dad went to try and find out half an hour ago, and he hasn't come back yet, so maybe he's found something out..."

Zack shrugged, then, and sat down on a chair beside the bed. "I wish I could tell you more, but I probably know as much as you. They let Billy in to sit with Jason for a little while after the first operation, while Mr Scott went home to get some stuff, but they kicked him out when he got back, and none of us have been able to get in since then. So we don't know what's going on, either."

After a moment of hesitation, Tommy spoke softly. "Dad told me that Jason said we were attacked by Goldar and Scorpina. Is that what happened? I get the feeling that everyone's holding back on me...."

Zack looked uncomfortable. "Well, that's what Jason said happened." "But is it what happened?" Tommy persisted. "Did... Did Zordon know what happened?"

Relief flowed through Zack. Here was a question he could honestly answer.

"Zordon didn't see what happened. The first thing he knew about it was when Billy told him, after Jason made it to his place." He paused for an instant. Time to start lying.... "Then Billy found you in the forest..."

Tommy frowned. "That's what Billy and Zordon both said, but I don't remember it. I only remember waking up in the Command Centre. I don't even really remember Billy bringing me to the hospital."

"Well, then, don't worry about it, man. Just concentrate on getting outta here, okay?"

Just then, Trini looked into the room. She saw Tommy was awake, and smiled tentatively at him. "Hi, Tommy."

He returned the smile with a tired one of his own. "Hey, Trini." "Zack, can I talk to you for a second? It's kind of important." "Sure. I'll be back in a minute, Tommy." Tommy nodded and slumped back against the pillow to wait. OUtside the room, Zack spoke in a whisper.

"Thanks for the interruption. I needed it." Trini swallowed hard. "I don't think you need this, Zack." "What....?"

"I just came from the Critical Care wing. They wouldn't let me in, but as I was leaving, Tommy's dad came out. He was crying, Zack..."

Zack froze, his breath catching in his throat. "Jason's not... He's not..."

"I don't know," Trini whimpered, starting to cry herself. "No one'll tell us anything. I don't know what's happening, or if he's even still alive!"

"He's still alive," a voice behind them confirmed, and they looked around to see Mark Oliver standing there. He was pale but certain, and he managed a small smile. "Jason is definitely alive, so you can both put that worry out of your minds. I'm sorry you saw me like that, Trini. I'm afraid I was just upset at seeing Jason so badly hurt."

"It's okay," Trini murmured, regaining her demeanor. "I'm just glad he's alive. Since they won't let us in to see him...."

"I know," Mark replied grimly. "Jason's asking to see all of you, but the doctors are being pretty stubborn about it."

"Tommy's really upset as well," Zack added, and Mark nodded. "Yes, he is. Jason wants to see him most of all, and he got into a real argument with Dr Richards about it. Richards finally agreed to let Tommy in to see him, at least, and I think Jason's going to use it as leverage so they'll let him see the rest of you."

Zack and Trini glanced at one another wonderingly. If Jason was demanding to see Tommy, then perhaps he honestly didn't have a true memory of what had happened either....

"Well," Zack said quietly, "whatever happens, we're all here. Even if they don't let us see Jason, as long as he knows we're nearby."

Mark smiled sadly as he stepped towards the door. "I'll make certain he knows. You kids look tired. Why don't you go get some rest?"

"No," Zack said. "I promised Tommy I'd stay with him for a little while. Trini...?"

Trini managed a weak smile. The truth was that she honestly wasn't sure if she could face Tommy right then, but she dared not say it out loud, in front of Tommy's father. "I'm pretty tired. I think I might go and find somewhere to curl up for a while."

Zack nodded, and followed Mark back into the room. Tommy was waiting for them.

"Did you find out anything, Dad?"

"As a matter of fact, I did. I spoke to Dr Richards, and he took me in to see Jason."

"And...?"

"Well, for starters, he's more worried about you than he is about himself."

Tommy smiled wearily. "Just like Jase... Is he okay, though? I mean, is he gonna be okay?"

"I'm sure he'll be fine." The words came out strangled, or so Mark thought. "I'll tell you honestly, though, because you might be allowed in to see him this evening. Right at the moment, he is extremely sick."

"Is he still losing a lot of blood?" Zack asked anxiously. Mark nodded.

"Yes. Dr Richards said they've got Kimberly pretty much laid up at the moment. They've been taking the blood from her as fast as she generates it. At the moment, it's really the only thing that's keeping Jason conscious."

"Kimberly...?" Tommy echoed anxiously.

"Yes," Mark told him. "She's okay, Tommy. When she got here with Zack and Trini, Jason was losing blood very quickly, and the hospital was starting to run low on supplies. She offered to donate to help him. They're both AB negative, and unfortunately, Kimberly happens to be the only one here at the moment who can donate to help Jason. He's still losing blood fast, though, so the nurses are just keeping her in the blood unit until more donors come forward."

Tommy slumped back against the pillows, visibly relieved. "So that's why she hasn't been in to see me. I thought... maybe..."

Zack spoke quickly. "We're all here for you, buddy. Don't stop believing that, okay?"

A faint smile flickered across Tommy's face. "Thanks, Zack." Zack nodded, carefully keeping all his other thoughts and emotions well hidden.

~*~

He shuddered inwardly. None of it seemed real. The strange thing was that he didn't feel all that terrible. Of course, they had been giving him heavy doses of painkillers, but even so.... And what, exactly, was dying supposed to feel like?

With a sick feeling, Jason realised he was scared almost beyond reason. The thought of one night shutting his eyes, going to sleep and never waking up again frightened him beyond comprehension. _oh god i don't want to die_

Tears came again, flooding his eyes and effectively blinding him. It wasn't fair. This should not be happening. Not to him. Sobbing softly, he pulled one of the pillows around and pressed it over his face, shutting out the sunlight that filtered into the room.

_why me? what the hell did i ever do wrong to deserve this? please, somebody help me.... i don't want to die...._

After a little while of letting his grief go into the pillow, he realised he had two choices. He could either lie back and try to accept his fate, or he could reject it entirely. He certainly didn't want to accept it, but on the other hand, how could he reject something that he'd been told was inevitable?

Confusion over ran his mind and soul, and he did the only thing he could think of. He forced all thoughts of death to the back of his mind and made himself go cold.

_that's it. don't think about it. if you don't think about it, it can't scare you..._

He took the pillow off his face and stared towards the window, letting himself go cold.

~*~

"Do you still want to see Tommy?"

For a long moment Jason didn't answer. Then, eventually, he gave a quick nod. "Yes."

Donavon withheld a sigh. He should have expected this reaction, he supposed. Throughout his entire life, whenever something had frightened Jason badly enough, he had gone totally cold and refused to face it, or even think about it. It was a reaction that he had just been starting to break over the last couple of years, and now he had to deal with this.

_well, can you blame him....?_

Donavon shut his eyes. No, he could not blame his son for reacting that way now. No teenager should have to face the reality of dying.

"Have you found Mum yet?"

He looked down at Jason, a little startled by his son's voice. Then, as he answered, his grief increased a little more.

"Not yet. I'm doing my best to find her. I spoke to your uncle yesterday, and he said your mother and your aunt left on a mystery trip yesterday. He doesn't know where they were going, or when they'll be back."

Jason blinked back a single tear. "I want Mum." "I know, Jason. ...Son, are you sure you're up to seeing Tommy? It can be put off until tomorrow...."

"No. I want to see him now."

Donavon sighed inwardly, and went to tell the duty nurse.

~*~

"Tommy! You're okay!"

Tommy looked his friend over, and visibly shuddered. "Oh man... You look like hell..."

Mark Oliver swallowed hard, noticing Donavon go white. He acted quickly. "C'mon, Donavon. Let's leave go and get some coffee."

Donavon allowed himself to be led out in silence. A moment later, Richards followed, leaving the two boys alone.

"I guess I do look pretty bad, don't I?" Jason said with a very small smile. Tommy glanced back at the door, then got out of the wheelchair and went over to the bedside.

"No kidding. You been out of bed at all?" "No. They won't let me out of this back brace, let alone out of bed.,I can hardly move on my own." He motioned to the two plaster casts on his legs. "I've got my own personal set of weights, here."

Tommy smiled uneasily. All of a sudden, he felt uncomfortable being there, and felt as though there was something else he should remember.

"Jase, d'you remember what happened? I can't remember anything, and no one'll tell me anything."

Jason nodded slowly. "Yeah. It was pretty bad. We were up at the lookout when Goldar suddenly showed up with Scorpina and a whole heap of putties. There were more than we've ever had to fight before. Man, we didn't have time to do anything. Morph, teleport... Not a thing. Scorpina went after you, and Goldar came after me. The last thing I saw of you was when you were being forced into the forest by Scorpina. After that, I didn't know what happened to you. I guess you must've managed to ditch her."

"I guess so. Billy said he found me wandering around in the forest, but I don't remember that. I don't remember any of it.

Jason nodded again. _good...._

"Well, I didn't get much of a chance to worry about you after you disappeared. About four or five putties grabbed me, and Goldar took my communicator and threw it over the cliff. He beat me up really badly, and took a knife to me..." Jason faltered, feeling a resurgence of the terror he'd felt in the instant before Tommy had thrown him over the edge of the lookout. He shut his eyes for an instant, struggling with the desperate fear that clawed at him from the inside.

"Jase, are you okay...?"

"Yeah," Jason managed to whisper. "Yeah, I'm okay. Then... Then Goldar threw me from the cliff..."

Tommy went white with shock. "Nobody told me that...." "It's okay," Jason told him, slowly regaining his sense of calm. "I'm okay, Tommy."

Tommy stared down at the blanket. Jason's fear was real enough, but he had known Jason long enough to know that the story was not.

"What really happened, Jase? I want to know the truth." Jason looked calmly at Tommy. "That is the truth. If you really don't remember, then you have to trust me. We were attacked by Goldar and Scorpina. That's it."

"Then why don't I believe you?"

"I think you have to believe me. Since you can't remember, my account is what everyone has to believe. What did Zordon tell you?"

"He told me what you're telling me. I don't know. Something just doesn't seem right."

"Don't worry about it, Tommy. You're still disoriented." Tommy sighed and nodded, knowing Jason was right. He decided to change the subject. "Are you gonna be okay?"

Jason hesitated, then shrugged lopsidedly. "Sure. I'll probably be stuck in a wheelchair for a few months, with both my legs broken, but I'm sure I'll be okay."

Again Tommy was suspicious. Jason was lying, and he could tell even more easily than before.

"Jase, how come you're lying to me? Don't you think I can tell? C'mon, I've known you for a year, and I know you're lying. I want to know the truth."

Jason's brave expression crumbled, then, revealing an expression of pure fear and misery. He spoke, and his voice was barely audible. "You don't want to know the truth, Tommy. I wish I didn't know, 'cause it's scaring the hell out of me."

Tommy pulled himself up to sit on the bed close to Jason. "You're not all right, are you? Jase, tell me, please...."

Jason looked away, fighting a sudden, fresh flood of tears. Forced again to confront the reality of his situation, he could no longer pretend he was fine.

"The doctors can't do anything else to help me. I was hurt too badly. They... Dr Richards said I've got just a week or two left...."

Tommy felt his heart very nearly cease beating in his chest. "What...?"

"I'm going to die," Jason whispered. "A week or two is all the time I have left. I'm dying..."

The tears came in a torrent, before Jason could stop them. Tommy hesitated, anxious to do something to comfort his friend. Finally, helplessly, he reached out and put one hand on Jason's shoulder, feeling woefully inadequate.

Jason felt Tommy's touch, and for just a bare instant, he wanted to scream at him to get out, that it was his fault. Then the anger was gone, and he submitted himself to his grief.

None of it was Tommy's fault, Jason told himself. It was Zedd. Zedd was the only one to blame.

"It's not fair," Tommy choked out, and Jason realised he was crying as well. "All this happens to you, and all I get is a headache... It... It should've been me..."

Jason looked up at Tommy, then, through a thin film of tears. "I need you to promise me something, Tommy. You have to promise me that whatever happens now, you won't blame yourself. None of what happened was your fault. Even if you remember what happened, it was not your fault. I don't blame you, and I'm not angry at you. I still love you as much as ever. We're brothers, Tommy, and we always will be, so don't ever blame yourself. No matter what happens..."

Tommy nodded. "I promise," he whispered. He hesitated again, then gently touched his hand to Jason's forehead, and whispered, more to himself than to Jason, "I love you too, Jase."

~*~

"What are you doing out of the wheelchair?" Mark asked wearily, in what he knew was a useless attempt to deflect conversation.

"Screw the wheelchair," Tommy said in a voice that was laced with anger and grief. "My best friend is dying. The wheelchair can go to hell."

They watched in silence as he walked past, and then Mark spoke softly. "The other kids are going to have to know."

Donavon barely heard him. "I have to find Sarah. Jason needs his mother."

Turning, he walked off down the corridor, leaving Ben to stand there in despairing silence.

~*~

"You told Tommy."

"I couldn't hide it from him," Jason said softly. Mark walked over to the bedside.

"He would have found out eventually. Better that it came from you, than from a doctor."

"I'm scared," Jason whispered. "I'm so damn scared...." Mark reached over and put one hand on Jason's shoulder. He could not find any words to say, but it wasn't necessary. Just as Tommy and Jason were like brothers, he had come to regard Jason with similar affection.

Jason shuddered, but didn't react to the hand on his shoulder. He shed no more tears, but simply stared blindly towards the ceiling.

~*~

Trini had been in to see her earlier, and had said that none of them were allowed in to see Jason, and that Tommy was fine. Her concern for Tommy had abated just a little on hearing that, and her fear for Jason had increased three fold.

She came to a halt and leaned against the wall, breathless and slightly dizzy. The nurses had tried to keep her in the blood unit until she'd recovered properly, but she'd refused, and had left before they could stop her. She had to get upstairs to see Tommy, at the very least, and perhaps he would be able to reassure her that Jason was all right.

Shutting her eyes for a moment, images flashed through her mind, of her asking the nurses constant question, and them evading each one with practised skill. Kimberly moaned softly to herself, and blinked back the tears. Everything was so screwed up, and although she wasn't angry at Tommy, she knew that Zack, Trini and Billy were. Unfortunately, she'd had enough difficulty dealing with the fear inside her to try and help Trini deal with her anger.

She began walking again, going over her thoughts and emotions as she walked. Lying in the blood unit, she had gone very thoroughly over everything that had happened and it had given her the opportunity to put aside any feelings of anger she'd had for Tommy. The others obviously had not been able to do that. Unfortunately, the hours of lying there, not knowing anything, had also caused her fear to increase. There she was, donating as much blood as she could for Jason, and she didn't even know if he was dead or alive.

Of course, she had to assume that he was alive, from the amount of blood they'd taken. A small smile flickered across her face, remembering the joking way that Jason had always called her his 'little sister'. Ever since discovering that they had exactly the same blood type, AB , he had come more and more to regard her with the affection of an older brother, and had been inclined to be equally protective of her. He had always been there to help her when she'd needed help, no matter what the situation, and now he was the one who needed the help....

Tears flooded Kim's eyes before she could stop them. She would have just about given her own life if it would save Jason. The blood she'd given felt like a very meagre trade for a guarantee that he would be all right. She would have turned back to the blood unit then, except for knowing that it was unnecessary.

They had let her go from the unit because the hospital had put out an urgent call to the Angel Grove/Stone Canyon district, asking for anyone with type AB blood to come and donate. Several had answered the call, including Adam Park from Stone Canyon, who also had that type blood.

Kim smiled wearily to herself as she recalled the exchange between her and Adam in the blood unit. Adam had asked what had happened with an adorably cute expression of deep concern, and she had told him the story that Trini had instructed her to stick to. Adam was no fool, and knew there was more to it than had been said, but had not pushed the issue. He had then taken her place in the blood unit, leaving her free to go and see Tommy.

She finally reached Tommy's room, and made her way to the door, hoping she would get there before she walked into something and fell over. She was nearly there when the sound of muffled sobs reached her ears. Hurrying in, she found Tommy on the floor in the corner of the room, crying so hard that he couldn't see her for the tears.

"Tommy...? Tommy, what's wrong?" She crouched down beside him, speaking anxiously. Tommy turned his head a little in her direction.

"Kim...?"

"Yeah, baby, it's me. What's wrong?"

A fresh flood of tears erupted, and Tommy began to cry even harder. "Hold me, Kim..." he managed to get out between the sobs. Kimberly did as he asked without speaking another word.

~*~

"What's going on?" Zack asked, feeling a little nervous.

"Jason wants some time alone with the four of you," Richards said quietly. "You can stay in here for half an hour, or so. No longer."

Jason was silent until all the adults had left the room, and spoke only when he was certain that no one else was around to hear. "Could you guys do me a favour?"

"Sure," Trini said gently, touching one hand lightly to his shoulder, as though trying to reassure him that they were actually there. "What is it?"

"Well, I can't leave the hospital to go to the Command Centre. Not strapped down like I am now. When you get a chance, could you tell Zordon and Alpha goodbye for me?"

A cold silence descended over the group for a long moment, and then Billy spoke in a hoarse whisper.

"What do you mean, "goodbye"? You're going to be okay...."

A look of sorrow flickered across Jason's face, and he had to struggle to look his friends in the eye. Even now, after having taken the time to think things over and trying to face his fate, it still did not seem real. "Dr Richards told me something yesterday. He... He said there was nothing more they could do to help me. Something about internal injuries... Damage to my heart... It was complicated."

Horrified silence reigned, and then Kimberly spoke in a trembling voice. "They can't save you... can they? That's why Tommy was so upset yesterday. You told him.... the doctors can't save you...."

Jason fought back the tears. "No, they can't."

Zack spoke, then, barely able to believe what he was hearing. "You mean... You're not going to.... I mean...."

"I'm dying," Jason confirmed softly, to their horror and disbelief. "They don't really know for sure how long I have. Dr Richards said maybe a couple of weeks, minimum, or I could last anything up to a couple of months. He... He said all they could do was make it as comfortable and painless for me as possible. I'm going to die...." Jason's voice cracked with emotion, and his friends quickly gathered round him protectively.

"Damn Tommy..." Zack whispered through a flood of tears. "Damn him..."

"No," Jason said suddenly, in a voice that was tight with determination. "No, it isn't Tommy's fault. I don't want any of you to blame him. Not for any reason. If you want to blame someone, blame Zedd, because that's who is really responsible. Not Tommy. Zedd used him to get to me, and it isn't his fault. That's the other reason I wanted to come here. I wanted to sort this out right now, so none of you turn on Tommy."

"But Jase..." Zack whispered, "Tommy was the one who attacked you..."

"Under Zedd's spell," Jason argued. "He didn't know what he was doing, and the fact that he doesn't remember any of it proves that. I don't want Tommy to remember. It'd destroy him if he knew the truth. I don't blame him for any of this, and I don't want any of you to blame him, either. I want you all to promise me, right now, that you won't ever blame him. Promise me, please."

Kimberly was the first to speak. "I don't blame him."

Billy shook his head. "Neither do I."

After a long moment, Zack sighed heavily. "I don't blame him, either. I won't turn on him, Jase. I promise."

Jason nodded, then looked over at Trini. She had moved back from the bed, one hand covering her mouth as she struggled uselessly to contain her tears.

"Trini...?"

"I can't, Trini whispered. "Jason, I can't...."

"You can't what?" he asked. Trini broke down, the tears coming in a torrent.

"I can't let you go...." She moved forward to stand by the bedside again. "I don't want to let you go, Jason. Please, don't leave us..."

Jason reached out and grasped her hand in his own. "Trini, if there was any way at all that would see me through this, then I'd take it. You know I would."

Trini leaned over, putting her arms around Jason as best as she was able, sobbing helplessly. Jason hesitated, then gently touched his hand to the side of her face and brushed back a loose strand of hair.

"This isn't any easier for me than it is for the rest of you. I'm scared as hell here. I don't know what I should be expecting. All the doctors can tell me is that they think I might have anything from a week to three or four months left, but they don't really know for sure, and that I may or may not go in my sleep. What am I supposed to do...?"

Billy reached out and put a hand on Jason's shoulder. "Whatever happens, Jason, we'll be with you all the way. No matter what. You don't have to be frightened. Think about what Zordon would say. Look inside yourself for the courage you need."

Jason nodded. "I know. True courage of a ranger, and all that. No offense, Billy, but that doesn't cover it this time. It doesn't help me at all. I'm going to die! It's certified! This isn't the same as going up against one of Zedd's monsters!"

Billy looked down. "I'm sorry, Jase."

"It's okay, Billy. I'm sorry, too." A faint sigh escaped Jason, and he looked back down at Trini, who was still crying softly. "I love you guys," he whispered. "You're my family. All of you...."

There was a moment of silence, and then Zack spoke softly as the door swung open and Richards stepped back into the room. "I think our half hour is up."

Jason looked around at each of his friends. "Don't forget."

"We won't forget," Kimberly promised in a voice that was choked with emotion. Jason smiled weakly, and reached up as much as he could to hug her quickly.

"We love you, Jason," she whispered, fighting back the tears.

"Same here," Jason whispered back, tears filling his own eyes.

~*~

"I guess. Have you found Mum, yet?"

Donavon smiled and nodded. At least he had one piece of heartening news for his son. "Yes. She called the mobile while you were with your friends. She'll be here by evening."

Jason sank back against the pillows, staring dismally at the casts on his legs. "Good. Did... Did you tell her?"

"Yes. She knows everything."

Jason merely nodded, not replying. Donavon sat back, watching his son with a feeling of deep sadness. He was terribly pale, Donavon noted, and seemed to be running a constant fever. Dr Richards had seemed uncertain whether Jason would even last the week. _this isn't supposed to happen... father's aren't supposed to bury their sons...._

He sat forward quickly as tears began to roll down Jason's cheeks. "What is it, Jason?"

Jason wiped away some of the tears. "Do people ever realise how stupid it sounds to ask someone who's dying if they're okay? Everyone who sees me asks if I'm okay, and I'm supposed to say yes! Well, I'm not okay! I'm going to die, and that's not okay! I'm going to die, and I'm scared..."

Donavon sighed. "I know you're scared, Jason. I don't blame you for being scared. I just wish I could do something about it."

"I can't even ask you to hug me," Jason said, his voice barely more than a miserable whimper. "I can't sit up, or anything."

Donavon sat up carefully on the edge of the bed, took Jason's left hand in his own, and put his other hand firmly on his son's shoulder.

"Try and be brave, Jason."

"Don't leave me, Dad."

"I won't, son. I promise."

~*~

Richards rubbed his chin thoughtfully. It was possible that this was the treatment he had been looking for, for Jason. Providing it worked, Jason would not die, as they expected him to. Providing it worked....

But that did not solve the back injury. Turning around, Richards lit up the screen behind him to look at the latest x rays that had been taken of Jason's injuries. Closer examination had resulted in the discovery of a small shard of broken rib that had somehow become embedded between the vertebrae.

Jason's spine already had a hairline fracture (incredible, Richards thought, that it had not been worse) and the nerves had suffered some damage. Up until the discovery of the piece of rib, though, that damage had been repairable. As if by some hideous twist of a cruel fate, that one, tiny piece of rib had become embedded in that fracture between the vertebrae, and the hairline fracture was no longer hairline.

Richards brushed the back of his hand across his forehead, pushing a lock of hair out of his eyes. The piece of rib was very gradually digging its way into the boy's spine, and through into the nerves. There was no one at Angel Grove Memorial skilled enough to remove the piece of bone ahead of the surgical procedure that Richards wanted performed, but to go ahead with the operation with the rib still there would be disastrous.

He turned away from the x ray. Two choices, both with terrible consequences. He could either take the decision to Jason and his father, and go ahead with the procedure, (the New York doctor was available to perform it; he had made certain of that) or he could wait and hope Jason survived long enough for a surgeon to arrive who had enough skill to remove the rib piece from the boy's spine. That, he knew, could be anything up to two or three months, and he was sure Jason did not have that much time.

Possible death.... or risk permanent paraplegia.... Richards moaned softly to himself as he got up. It was a hell of a decision for a seventeen year old to have to make, but Richards could not justify making such a decision for him. Jason had to be the one to decide.

Grabbing his notes and the journal, Richards hurried from his office.

~*~

"It's okay, Mum. You're here now."

"Oh, baby, I love you. You can hold on to me now, sweetheart. I'm not going to leave you.

Jason let the tears flow, and did the only thing he could. He held on tightly to his mother's hand.

~*~

Jason looked startled, and just a little bit hopeful. "What? Seriously...?"

"It's an experimental procedure," Richards explained. "It's only been done less than half a dozen times, but it has worked before. If it doesn't work, I can at least guarantee that you won't have lost any time. On the other hand, if it does work, you won't die."

"What's the catch?" Donavon asked warily.

Richards looked grim. "There is a catch," he confessed grimly. "It's the spinal injury that Jason has. We've discovered a very small piece of broken rib that is embedded between the vertebrae, at a point in the lower back. Unfortunately, there's no one here who is able to remove it, and we may not be able to get a hold of someone for up to two months. However, the surgeon who designed the procedure I mentioned is available right now, and is willing to fly out here to perform it."

"So what happens if you go ahead with this, but don't get rid of the piece of rib?" Jason asked, not entirely sure he wanted to hear the answer.

"There's a chance that it could result in permanent paraplegia. The rib piece is already digging in against the nerves, and further pressure could mean irrepairable damage. If that happens, then there'll be nothing we can do about it."

Jason was pale. "You mean, even if the operation doesn't work, I could still end up a cripple..."

"That's a possibility, I'm afraid."

For several seconds, Jason stared up at the ceiling, trying not to feel sick. "But I might not live long enough for someone to come here and remove the bit of bone."

"No. It's unlikely."

"Can't this guy from New York take it out....?"

"No, I'm afraid not. He's a specialist, and he doesn't want to risk it. Jason, the spine is a very delicate part of the body. Risking paraplegia with this operation is one thing, but if the wrong person tries to remove the piece of rib, they could quite conceivably kill you."

Jason looked to his parents, anxious for help. "Mum...? Dad...?"

"It's your decision, honey," Sarah told him gently. Donavon nodded.

"Just remember, we'll be right here with you, no matter what you decide."

"So I can't afford to wait to have this piece of rib taken out, but if I go ahead with this operation, I could end up in a wheelchair for the rest of my life."

Richards nodded, looking very slightly queezy. "Yes, that's the bottom line."

Jason shut his eyes. Somehow, he would have felt strangely better if his parents had made a decision one way or the other. But to leave it open for him to decide.... Death.... or life as a cripple.... _not much of a choice either way_ he thought dismally. _but if i have the operation, and it works, at least i'll live..._

His words to Trini came back to haunt him. _if there was any way at all that would see me through this, then i'd take it..._

"What are the chances of dying during surgery?" Richards nearly choked. That was not a common question from someone of Jason's age. Still, he supposed, it was justified...

"Probably slightly higher than if you were, say, having your appendix removed. That won't happen as long as I can help it, though, I promise."

Jason made his decision. "I'll have the operation."

Richards was surprised. "That was quick..."

Jason shrugged. "I'd rather live in a wheelchair than just lie back and wait to die. I'm not ready to die, yet. I want the operation."

"It may not happen like that, Jason. There's a good chance that it will work, with no side effects."

Jason smiled wryly. "I'm not stupid, Doc. I can read your face like a book. I'll bet the odds of making it through that operation without losing the use of my legs are extremely remote. Right?"

Richards couldn't bring himself to answer. Instead, he looked to Donavon and Sarah, and both parents nodded.

"If Jason wants it," Donavon said softly, "then we'll consent."

"I've got less to lose by losing the use of my legs," Jason added, "than I do by losing my life."

Richards nodded. "All right. I'll call the surgeon in New York and tell him that you want to go ahead with it. He'll be here by tomorrow afternoon."

Richards hurried from the room, leaving the family alone. "I don't want to tell the others about this," Jason said quietly. "Not until I've had the operation. I don't want them getting hopeful if it doesn't work."

Donavon agreed, then spoke hesitantly. "Jason, you do understand the consequences of this, don't you?"

"I think so," Jason said softly. "I know there's a chance that I might end up in a wheelchair, but if it works, then at least I'll live. Right now, that's all I care about."

Neither Donavon nor Sarah replied to that because, right then, it was all they could think about as well.

~*~

"Ready to go?" he asked quietly. Jason glanced at him. "Mind if I have a minute alone? I just wanted to... I mean...."

"It's okay," Richards told him. "I understand. We'll come and get you in a couple of minutes."

Left alone, Jason shut his eyes, desperately trying to remember what it had been like towalk. _one step in front of the other... bare feet pressing on a cold tiled floor... or soft carpet..._

He sighed inwardly. It would have meant more if he had been able to get up and actually pace the floor, but that option was out. Opening his eyes again, he thought with a touch of despair about all the things he risked losing. All the years he had spent training in the martial arts.... The skill he'd gained.... Being a Power Ranger....

Nausea rushed through Jason's system. He hadn't fully realised how much of his life had been devoted to martial arts and, more recently, to being a Power Ranger. Basically it was his entire life; there was very little else that he had ever been interested in.

"I'm gonna be in a wheelchair," he whispered to himself, and felt the sharp prick of fear that accompanied the realisation.

shut up, scott. don't think like that. you heard doc richards; it's only a maybe, not a definite

_but i'm not stupid. look at what's happened so far. i'd never be that lucky_

Jason moaned softly, wondering just what he had done wrong in his life to deserve this. He knew, of course, that he could postpone the operation and wait, but then it might not make any difference in the long run. The chances of him dying before a surgeon could remove the shard of rib was high, and he knew it.

_zedd, i hope you're happy. you've finally won one_ Tears flickered in his eyes, but he made no attempt to wipe them away. He had a dozen options open to him, and none were likely to end happily. The path he was about to take was the best chance he had, regardless of the possible consequences.

The possibility of losing the use of his legs frightened the hell out of him of course, if he'd dared face up to it, but the cold fact was that dying scared him even more.

please, God, let this work. i don't want to die...

The door swung open, and Richards looked in. "It's time to go, Jason."

Jason nodded as the orderlies came in. "Okay. I'm ready."

~*~

Tommy brushed one hand absently across his face, wiping away a single tear that rolled down his cheek. He was supposed to leave the hospital tomorrow, but he didn't think his conscience would allow it. Even now, despite the constant reassurances he was getting, he still felt that there was something that everyone was hiding from him.

He sighed to himself as he stepped out of the elevator. No point in worrying about it now.... He came to an abrupt halt upon seeing Donavon and Sarah Scott standing outside the Critical Care wing, both of them pale, and holding each other protectively.

"What's going on?" he asked, a chill running down his spine. "Where's Jason?"

"In surgery," Donavon told him after a moment of hesitation, remembering Jason's request not to tell anyone until the operation was over. Tommy came forward, startled and frightened.

"Has something happened? He didn't.... He hasn't...."

"No," Sarah reassured him gently. "Jason didn't want any of you to know until afterwards, in case it doesn't work, but Dr Richards found a procedure that might save him."

Tommy's face lit up. "Really?"

"It might, Tommy," Donavon said. "It may not make any difference at all."

"But it might save him," Tommy said. "Is that where he is now? Having this operation?"

Donavon nodded. "Yes. Tommy, there's something else. If it works..."

"Yeah?"

"There's a very small piece of rib that's stuck between a couple of the vertebrae in Jason's spine. It's a possibility that this operation could increase the pressure on the nerves.... Tommy, Jason could end up in a wheelchair."

Tommy was horrified. "He'll be crippled....?"

"Maybe. It's not a definite thing. The chances are high, though, that it could happen."

Shocked silence reigned, and Tommy shut his eyes tightly, trying to comprehend the thought.

"It was Jason's decision," Sarah added gently. "He said he'd rather take the chance of living in a wheelchair than lie back and wait to die."

After a moment, Tommy nodded. "That's Jason all right. Oh man, I hope this works..."

Donavon nodded as he held Sarah close. "So do we, Tommy."

~*~

"Donavon?" Sarah whispered finally, unable to keep her fear to herself any longer. He looked over at her, and she saw he was equally fearful. "What if he doesn't survive the operation?"

"He will," Donavon replied, although his voice was strained. "Don't think like that, honey. He will survive."

"Then why hasn't Dr Richards come? Why is it taking so long?"

Donavon sighed heavily and sat down with a thud on the bed. "We knew it was going to take a long time. They said anything up to four hours. It's just gone three hours now."

Sarah buried her face in her hands. "I hate waiting."

"I know, but we don't have a choice. Let's just try and keep our hopes up, okay. For Jason."

She nodded and was about to reply when the door swung open and Dr Richards walked in, looking exhausted, but unable to conceal his relief. "We won't know for certain for another several hours," he told them breathlessly, "but I'm ninety five percent sure that it worked. Jason's going to pull through, folks."

Sarah gave a sob of relief, going over and hugging her husband tightly. Donavon spoke tentatively, asking a question that he already knew the answer to.

"And his legs....?"

Richards smile faded quickly. "We won't know for certain until he recovers from the anaesthetic, but.... I'm afraid it doesn't look too hopeful. All we can do is keep our fingers crossed, and hope."

Donavon sighed softly. "Right now it doesn't matter. All that matters is that our boy is going to be all right. Thankyou, Dr Richards."

Richards smiled. "It's my pleasure. We'll be bringing Jason back up here as soon as he's woken up from the anaesthetic. It shouldn't be too long."

Donavon nodded. "We'll wait."

A smile flickered across Richards' face and he hurried from the room, leaving the Scotts to their relief and happiness.

~*~

"It worked," Donavon said, and Tommy very nearly cried with relief.

"What's going on?" Kimberly asked, her voice strained.

"Jason had an operation," Tommy told her. "It worked. He isn't going to die!"

Both Kimberly and Billy stood frozen in shock. Then, finally, Billy spoke tensely. "Are you serious, Tommy?"

"He's serious," Donavon said, almost crying with relief himself. "The operation worked. Jason's going to live."

Mark Oliver heaved a sigh of relief. "That's the best news I've heard in days."

Suddenly Tommy's expression altered as he remembered something else. "Mr. Scott, what about the.... you know....?"

Donavon spoke softly. "They won't know for sure until Jason wakes up, but Dr Richards said it doesn't look very good. It looks like he's going to be in a wheelchair."

Kimberly gasped in shock. "What....?"

"A side effect of the operation," Donavon explained quietly. "There was a piece of rib embedded in Jason's spine, and no one here was able to remove it. They went into this operation with the risk of doing permanent damage to Jason's spine."

Horrified silence fell as both Kimberly and Billy tried to comprehend the thought of their best friend in a wheelchair. Mark spoke softly, trying to keep his voice steady. "And this was Jason's choice?"

Donavon nodded. "His decision entirely. He knew the possible consequences of the operation when he agreed to it. He knew he risked being in a wheelchair for the rest of his life."

Billy moaned softly, then, and looked as though he was about to collapse. Mark hurried over and guided him into a chair. "Take it easy, Billy. Just breathe...."

Billy shuddered, feeling overcome by the suddenly rank smell of the hospital. The image of Jason in a wheelchair was not one that he thought he could cope with. "He's.... He might never walk again...? Not even with leg braces...?"

"No," Donavon said quietly, "not if it turns out that the operation has left him a paraplegic. For the most part, leg braces are for people that have no feeling in the legs, but can still move them, like Spina Bifida people. If it's the way it's worked out, Jason will have no use of his legs at all. We don't know for sure yet, but Dr Richards wasn't very confident. I'm just telling you all this now, so you can deal with it in your own minds now, before you see Jason."

Kimberly nodded, feeling remarkably strong willed. "We'll deal with it. If it was Jason's choice, then we'll back him up. We promise."

"Thank you," Donavon murmured. "Have you seen Zack and Trini? I'd like to tell them myself..."

"In the cafeteria," Tommy replied. He was unable to conceal his own happiness and relief, nor did he even try. The news that his best friend was going to live made it that much easier for him to be able to walk out of the hospital the next morning....

Donavon moved towards the door. "Okay. I'll just head down there... Oh, and Jason should be back in his room in an hour or so. You're all welcome to come up and see him, although I don't know how coherent he'll be."

They watched as Donavon left the room, and then Kimberly, unable to contain her joy any longer, let out a loud whoop. "Did you hear that? Jason's going to be okay!"

Tommy grinned broadly, and then his gaze fell on Billy, who still sat in the chair, stunned by the news.

"Billy, didn't you hear? Jason's not going to die! He's going to be okay!"

Billy looked up at Tommy with a haunted expression. "Didn't you hear? He could end up in a wheelchair. He might be paraplegic... I don't think that's anything to celebrate."

The smile on Tommy's face fell away like a rock. "Billy, it was Jason's decision. Whether we agree with it or not, we have to stand by him if that's the way it works out. And personally, I'd rather have Jason here with us, even if it is in a wheelchair, rather than go to his funeral."

For a brief instant, a look of pure rage flashed across Billy's face, lighting his eyes with a frightening expression of malice. _easy for you to say.... and you're the one that hurt jason in the first place..._

Then the anger was gone, forced back into the recesses of Billy's mind. "I know," he said softly. "It's just going to take a lot of getting used to."

Kimberly walked over and gave Billy a warm hug. "You heard Jason's dad, Billy. It's only a 'maybe'. He might be okay! Anyway, even if he isn't, we'll still get past this. I know we will."

Billy just shut his eyes, praying silently that Kimberly was right.

~*~

"Jason, honey, can you hear me?" Sarah asked softly, and was answered by a faint moan. She smiled and lightly stroked his forehead. "It's okay, baby. You're going to be okay."

Tommy moved forward, then, and reached out to gently grasp Jason's hand in his own. "You hear that, Jase? You're gonna be okay. You're gonna live, buddy."

The other rangers stood back, exchanging glances, but none of them said a word.

Angel Grove Memorial Hospital....
It was just before dawn, and the very first hints of sun were starting to creep through the curtains and into the room in the Critical Care Wing where Jason slept. It had been several hours since he had been brought back from Recovery, and aside from the few minutes of blurred consciousness with his friends present, he had not woken up at all.

Sarah Scott slept soundly in the chair next to Jason's bed, having been unable to stay awake for the duration of the night. Donavon had left the hospital hours ago to go home and get some proper rest in his own bed. It was the first time since the entire mess had started that he had been able to lie down and close his eyes, and not have to fear for his son's life.

Dawn broke, and sunlight streamed into the room, lighting it up with a gentle, warm glow. From the bed there came a faint moan, and Jason's head moved from one side to the other as he started to regain consciousness. Very slowly, he came back into awareness, conscious, at first, only of the dull pain that throbbed in his chest. Then, as he opened his eyes and managed to focus, he saw his mother, slumped in the chair, asleep.

A faint smile flickered across his lips, and for once did not mind the twinge of pain that it caused him. He very vaguely remembered someone speaking to him.... when? in recovery? in a dream.....? telling him he would be all right, that he would live. He took in his mother's expression, the hint of a smile on her face, and knew it was the truth.

i'm going to be okay....

A feeling of joy and relief exploded inside Jason, and he let his anxiety out in a choked sob. Sarah awoke at the sound, and sat up quickly. A moment later, her face lit up when she saw Jason was awake.

"Honey....?"

Jason looked over at her, tears in his eyes. "Mum...." She stood up quickly, grasping his hand in her own. "It's okay, baby. You're going to be okay. You hear me, sweetheart? You're going to live...."

Jason shut his eyes, letting the tears come freely. Sarah leaned over and hugged him as best as she was able, starting to cry with relief herself.

A few minutes had passed when the door swung open and Dr Richards looked in. A faint smile broke out across his face at the sight of mother and son together.

"Celebrating the good news?" he asked as Sarah straightened up and brushed a hand over her eyes. He smiled down at Jason. "How are you feeling?"

"Like crap," Jason muttered, and both Richards and Sarah laughed. "Well, at least you're honest," the doctor replied. "Don't worry. You'll be feeling much better in a few weeks. There's something we have to talk about, though. I think you know what it is."

Jason looked down at his legs, and felt a slight twinge of unease. For the first time, his legs weren't itching beneath the plaster casts. A moment later, the unease grew much stronger.

"I can't feel my legs...." he whispered hoarsely, suddenly frightened. Richards looked sorrowful.

"I just got the final x rays back. The piece of rib that I told you about...? The pressure on it from the operation pushed it all the way through the nerves, and severed them completely."

Jason slumped back into the pillows, fighting fresh tears. "I knew this could happen. I knew it..."

Richards came all the way over to the bedside and spoke quietly. "Yes, you did know. But that doesn't mean you have no right to be upset. I'd be worried if you weren't. If you want to cry, scream, throw the pillows across the room, then go ahead and do it."

"What's going to happen now?" Sarah asked softly. "Well, for starters, the breaks in Jason's legs had nearly been repaired, so we'll take the casts off and put in stainless steel pins until the breaks areproperly mended. We'll also remove the piece of rib, so it can't cause any further damage."

He paused, on the verge of saying they would need to get a wheelchair for Jason, but stopped himself. Jason had enough to deal with for the moment, and would have to think about that soon enough. Now was not the time to throw it at him.

"I'll contact your husband and let him know, Mrs Scott," Richards told Sarah. She nodded quickly, not wanting to leave Jason alone. He hesitated, then spoke quietly. "I'm really sorry, Jason. We did the very best we could."

Jason blinked back the tears. "Thankyou, Dr Richards," he said in a trembling voice. Richards nodded, and ducked out of the room.

"It's going to be okay, sweetheart," Sarah murmured, stroking his forehead in a light, soothing motion. "You'll be all right."

"I don't want to be crippled..." Jason whispered, his eyes shut tightly. Sarah held back a sigh.

"I know, baby. You have to be strong, now. We all do." "I don't want to be strong...." His words trailed off as he began to cry, and after a long moment, so did Sarah.

A week later....
Zack and Billy headed wearily along the hospital corridor, trying hard not to walk into each other. It had been one week since Jason had had the life saving operation, and was now one week into his life as a paraplegic.

Both boys still shuddered when they recalled Donavon Scott coming to tell them that the nerves in Jason's spine had been virtually severed, and he would be in a wheelchair for the rest of his life. It was a horrible thought but it was one they knew they would have to deal with, for if they couldn't deal with it, then what hope did Jason have? He, after all, was the one who would have to live with it.

"Don't let me sit down," Zack mumbled as they headed towards Jason's room. "If I do, I'm gonna pass out."

Billy managed a faint smile. He knew he was in danger of the same thing happening. Since they'd been told that Jason would survive, their parents had shunted them all back to school, claiming they had no more excuses to skip it. As such, the nurses had taken a stricter stance of visiting times, and would allow only two of them in to see Jason at a time, outside of school hours.

It was Billy and Zack's turn that afternoon, although they had been tempted to pass their turn over to the girls, so exhausted were they.

Jason was alone when they went in, half sitting up in the hospital bed. He was slowly thumbing through magazines that were strewn all over the bed and frowning to himself as he did so. Although still weak and tired, Jason's physical condition was definitely improving, and they could all see it.

"Hey, guys," Jason said cheerfully when they came in. "How was school?"

Zack moaned out loud. "Just great. We got another catch up assignment today. Man, you are gonna be absolutely loaded with schoolwork when you get back...."

Jason smirked. "Yeah, well, I'm enjoying the peace while I can."

"What are you looking at?" Billy asked curiously. "Catalogues," Jason answered. He picked one up off the bed and threw it in Zack and Billy's direction. "Here, you can help me."

Zack grabbed the magazine as it hit his chest, and opened it out to look at it properly. A moment later, he looked back to Jason, feeling sick. "Catalogues for wheelchairs?"

Jason nodded. "Yeah. Dad said I could pick whichever one I wanted. He gave me a whole lot of catalogues this morning. I tossed out the ones for motorized wheelchairs, though. I want a manual one, so I don't get lazy."

"How can you be so cheerful about it?" Billy blurted out. "Jase, you're..."

Jason regarded Billy somberly. "I'm what? A cripple?"

Billy flushed bright red with embarrassment, and Zack stepped forward quickly in his defense. "Take it easy, Jase. Billy just meant...."

"I know what he meant," Jason interrupted lightly, "and I'm not angry. I know it's going to take a lot of getting used to, for all of us. Especially for me. You think I wanted this to happen? I didn't. I wanted to come through that operation and have Dr Richards tell me everything was fine. The point is, it did happen, and now I have to live with it. But, at least I'm going to live. Look, I just don't want you guys to think of me as a cripple, 'cause I'm not. A cripple is someone who can't do anything for themselves, and I'm not going to be helpless. Not like that." He paused, and a wicked grin flashed over his face. "I'm gonna be a wheelie. Now get over here and help me pick one of these out!"

Billy and Zack exchanged smiles and went over to the bed to do as they were told.

The two boys soon found Jason's enthusiasm catching, and were quickly caught up in the search for a suitable chair. Finally, Jason thumped his hand down on one of the catalogues, his mind made up. "This is the one. This one right here."

Zack and Billy both leaned forward to see. "That sports model?" Zack asked.

Jason nodded. "Yeah. Good for all round use. I'll get plenty of exercise with it."

Billy nodded. "It looks like a very good model."

"Decided on one, have you?"

Jason, Zack and Billy looked over to the door to see Donavon Scott walking in. A grin flashed across Jason's face. "Uh huh. This one here."

"Let me see," Donavon said, walking over and taking the catalogue from his son. "The sports model in the middle?"

"Yeah."

Donavon nodded. "All right. I'll order it now, and with luck, you'll have it by the end of the week."

Jason sank back happily into the pillows as his father went to carry out the task. "This isn't so bad," he commented casually. Zack and Billy exchanged uneasy looks.

"Jase...." Zack said tentatively.

Jason looked across at him. "What?"

Zack hesitated, then made himself speak. "It's not all gonna be a bed of roses...."

Jason looked calmly at Zack. "You think I don't know that? C'mon, Zack, I'm not stupid. I know I'm not gonna have it easy. I'm just trying to deal with it without going down in a screaming fit of panic."

"I just thought..." Zack mumbled.

"It's okay, Zack," Jason told him quietly. "Look, right now, I'm just happy to be alive. I'll probably get depressed later."

"What does it feel like?" Billy asked softly, a hint of curiosity in his voice. Jason stared down the bed at his legs and feet for a long moment before answering.

"It doesn't. That's about the best way I can describe it. It's like I've just been cut off at the waist. Yesterday I thought I could feel my legs aching, but Dr Richards said it was just phantom pain. Even that's gone, now. There's absolutely nothing there. I can't move them, and I can't feel them. Except for when I lean back, I can't even feel myself sitting on this bed."

"That's pretty intense," Zack said.

Jason nodded. "I know. If I let myself think about it long enough, I'd probably end up frightened out of my wits."

"Then don't think about it," Billy told him quietly. "Not yet, anyway. Not when you're alone."

Jason shook his head. "I have no intention of doing that. Trust me." He paused, then asked quietly, "Has Zordon found a new Red Ranger yet?"

Billy and Zack exchanged uneasy looks, not entirely sure that it was something they should tell Jason.

"C'mon," Jason growled, annoyed by their deliberate caution. "I'm stable, okay? I'm not gonna flip out. Yet."
Zack smiled weakly, and gave in. "Sorry. He picked Rocky. You know, from Stone Canyon....?"

Jason looked thoughtful. "Yeah. Good choice. I haven't seen Rocky, Adam or Aisha around for a while...."

"Well," Zack said, "Adam was up here pretty frequently before you knew about the operation. He donated a fair bit of blood."

Jason smiled to himself. "Sounds like I've got a few people to thank for keeping me alive. I still haven't thanked Kim...."

"Everything's all right, Jason," Billy reassured him. "Kimberly knows you appreciate it."

"No," Jason said firmly, "it isn't enough. If it wasn't for Kim, I would never have survived the first day in here. I owe her my life."

Zack smirked. "Jase, you tell her that and she'll probably faint."

"Either that," Billy added jokingly, "or hold you to ransom."

Jason laughed openly, a sound that both Zack and Billy had badly missed. "Okay, you're probably right," Jason said, "but I still want to thank her. Adam, too. I wish I could thank everyone who donated blood, but I don't think I'm going to get the chance."

"I think you're right," Zack said with a chuckle.