Author's Note: Now I have eight irrepressible muses. I can GUARANTEE that the villians would never have attacked Earth if they'd had muses. Then again... the villian's personality would match up with the muses.... Anyways, some characters mentioned herein, belong to the wonderful Robert J. Gutheim.
Dedication: This fic I have no choice but to dedicate to the people of my ex-class of Economics, who went through a period of time when our teacher refused to acknowledge the existence of muses. Those people are: David Akele, Jason Amadio, Kellie Basman, Tim Bottomley, Gianmario Cipollone, Karina Goard, Gary Kisten, Daniel Marin, Adam Niewidok, Daniel Pastro, Ebony Preen, Mr. Mark Smith [teacher], Luke Timpano and Michael Todd.
This muse fic proves that muses exist. This is done by the simple and indisputable fact that the nine books of Herodotus: The Histories are named after the Nine Muses. Therefore, muses must exist, since if they didn't, the nine books would not be named after them. *You tell 'em!!* Thank you, Ebrale Chan. Get back to work. You are, after all, a muse. And the bane of existence of the Economics class.... [sigh]

Insanity Abound
by Mistri, Cho's Observer

Another quiet day.

For once, the muses were being relatively good. Not destroying half the place in the many 'discussions' they have, not complaining bitterly over their wrangles with DataTrekster, not doing much of anything.

"Girls, what the hell is wrong with you?" I asked, surprised that anyone could be that listless, especially when they're usually up and at 'em!

"Ah..." said Kalends. "We're just feeling out of sorts."

"You girls are alright, though?" A chorus of voices answered in the affirmative, and I turned back to my thoughts. I then announced my tiny surprise, which I had been saving, but now was a good time as any, considering their state.

"Oh, girls? You asked me to find out the names of the nine Muses? After which the nine books of Herodotus: The History are named?"

"Yeah," said Brlyn listlessly.

"Clio, Euterpe, Thalia, Melpomene, Terpsichore, Erato, Polymnia, Urania and Calliope," I announced dramatically.

Their eyes widened, and they seemed to perk up. These Muses were the head honchos, so far up in the chain of command that they were pratically myth to young muses such as my ones.

"Really?" breathed Lares. Suddenly, they were energized! I ought to do this more often, I thought.

"You know," said Kalends. "There used to to be at the Central Muses Agency, one day every year, when one of them would appear and talk to us about our responsibilities as Muses." The others nodded.

"And Ted was bragging about how one of them, I think it was Thalia, seduced him and made a muse out of him," said Vedic.

"I wouldn't trust what Ted says as far as I could throw him, Vedic," I said. "Anyway, if you're off the subject..."

"What about the collaboration you're working on with Robert?" asked Geneva. I shot a glance at her.

"It's going fine, Geneva. In fact, you girls can think up a plausible song to use as the Resistance's tune." I knew that would keep them busy, and it would entertain them, if nothing else. Robert would have to okay it of course. If he did, it would be a good thing cause it would fit in with a plot I had.

God has smiled upon you, this day..
The fate of a world in your hands..
And blessed be the teenagers..
Who'll fight with all our bravery..
'till only the righteous stand.

You'll see the distant flames, they bellow in the night
You'll fight in all our names, for what we know is right
And when you all get shot, and cannot carry on
Though you die, La Resistance lives on.
You may get stabbed in the head, with a dagger or a sword
You may be burned to death, or skinned alive, or worse!
But when they torture you, you will not feel the need to run
For though you die, La Resistance lives on.

Sue: Blame UAE! Blame UAE!
Because the world's gone awry
Tomorrow night those freaks will FRY!

Team Angel: Tomorrow night, our lives will change.
Tomorrow night, we'll be entertained.
An execution, what a sight.. tomorrow night!

Vadaei: Down there, there is so much room
Where babies burp, and flowers bloom
Tomorrow night down there is doomed
And so, I will be going soon!

Mechinack and Hankoid: Shut your whining face, Uncle Zeddy!
You're an evil-using bastard, Uncle Zeddy!
Looks like we may be out of luck,
Tomorrow night, we're pretty fucked!

Why did the UAE start this war?
What the fuck are they fighting for?
When did this song become a marathon?

Vadei: I want to be.. up.. there..
Sue: When the UAE is dead and gone
There'll be no more Lord Xenon!

They may cut your morpher in half (tomorrow night!)
And serve it to a pig (our lives will change!)
And though it hurts, you'll laugh.. (tomorrow night!)
And dance a morphless jig. (we'll be entertained!)
But that's the way it goes (an execution?)
In war, you are shat upon! (what a sight!)
Though you die.. (tomorrow night..)

La.. Resistance.. lives.. on!
Blame UAE! Blame UAE! Blame UAE!

I glanced at them, and sighed. "You know, I didn't mean for you to rip of La Resistance from South Park: Bigger, Longer and Uncut. That aside, it was nice of you to put in the correct people." They shrugged.

"We don't care," they said. I grimaced.

I just had to get the slightly too-energized, easily influenced [by this I mean TED, thus now lacking a sense of morality]; I just had to get these muses, didn't I? But they smiled.

Then Calika, Ebrale and Destini all whispered reverently, "This is the way to get Mr. Smith to acknowledge the existence of muses." I considered.

"Okay." So I showed him.

End