End
"Tell me again, Bulkie, why are we wandering around this part of the beach?" Skull wondered as he tramped through the sand after his partner-in-crime. "No one ever comes here."
"I've already told you a half a dozen times --to search for clues about the true identities of the Power Rangers," Bulk reminded him with barely checked impatience. "This was one of the last places the Rangers were spotted."
"Oh yeah!"
"Come on, numbskull."
"Right behind ya, Bulkie!"
The two hadn't ventured far when they heard--
"Sik - ah!"
"Hai - ya!"
"Putties, attack!"
The pair turned to each other.
"Power Rangers!" they exclaimed. As quickly as they could, they raced for a nearby outcropping of concealing rock and scrambled to a position where they had an unobstructed view of the action. What they saw were the Red Ranger and the new White Ranger, a horde of putties, and a winged monkey in gold armor.
"It's that Goldar goon," Skull gasped.
"Sh! They'll hear you!" Bulk cautioned, having enough sense not to want to draw the monster's attention. Still, he couldn't hold in a soft, "Come on, Rangers!" as they battled the gray henchmen. True to form, the Rangers made short work of the clay mob.
"What's with the new guy?" Bulk wondered, noticing that the White Ranger appeared to be staggering as he and the Red Ranger turned to face Goldar. "Those gray guys never laid a hand on him."
"Maybe he was hurt before we got here," Skull hypothesized, cracking his gum more loudly than normal in his nervousness and excitement.
"Don't be silly; what could possibly hurt the ...."
Before Bulk could finish his sentence, the White Ranger yelled.
"Look out!" He shoved his teammate out of the way as Goldar released some sort of energy blast. The newest Ranger caught the brunt of the explosion and flew back, crashing into the rocks near Bulk and Skull's hiding place.
"That had to hurt," Skull winced.
Meanwhile, Jason was doing his best to dodge a series of lethal bolts while trying to work his way over to Tommy.
"Yes, run, pathetic human!" Goldar gloated. "Alone, you cannot hope to defeat me! Surrender to Lord Zedd!"
"Never!" Jason deflected another crimson burst with his sword, but the impact sent his blade flying.
"Uh oh," the anxious observers gasped.
However, the maneuver enabled him to leap over to where Tommy struggled to recover.
"You okay, bro?"
"Yeah, but man, my head's spinning."
"Now I have you!" Goldar crowed.
"Any ideas? The others are still taking care of the monster in the park," Jason reported.
"Take Saba; he has a few tricks in `im," Tommy said, handing over his sword. "You will work for someone other than me, won't you Saba?"
"Of course," the tiger-headed hilt answered.
"Whoa, a talking sword!" Bulk whispered.
"Hang in there, buddy," Jason said and leaped into the fray once again, and his unknown audience was treated to an awesome duel and to the sight of the winged monster turning tail and running as the Red Ranger unleashed Saba's energy blast.
"Next time, Rangers ...." Goldar promised as he vanished.
"Next time, you're toast, Goldilocks," Tommy muttered as he staggered to his feet and headed out to congratulate his best friend.
"Man, can you believe it? We were close enough to touch two Power Rangers," Skull murmured in awe. "We could actually hear every word they said."
"Did you recognize their voices?" Bulk asked eagerly.
"Ah ... no."
"You dweeb! Aren't you good for anything?"
"It was kind of hard, Bulkie; I mean, their voices sounded funny --like when you're using walkie talkies and there's static and everything when you talk."
"I bet their helmets have a device which disguises their voices."
"Isn't that what I just said?"
"Pipe down! They're still out there. Maybe if we stick around, they'll say or do something that'll tell us who the really are." The two fell silent and maintained their vigil.
"... monster in the park is history," came the report over Tommy's communicator.
"Great work, guys. Goldar's gone, too. We'll catch up with you in a little while," he replied.
"Are you sure you're all right?" Jason asked.
"A little singed, but I'm fine. Man, these new powers are something else!"
"With Zedd's greater strength, we need the additional firepower." The Red Ranger bent to retrieve his sword; Tommy suddenly moaned deeply --but it wasn't from pain.
"Damn, but you fill out that uniform good," he sighed, running a gloved hand over the Red Ranger's butt.
"What?!?" Bulk and Skull gulped as one, thoroughly stunned as the White Ranger grabbed his teammate's hips and pulled them back into his groin.
"Take it easy; we're still in uniform," Jason scolded, but he didn't draw away.
"I can't help it; it's never been this intense before," Tommy replied. "Besides, we got you taken care of before we were interrupted. I still have the last dose on top of this one in me!"
"You ain't kidding, bro; you're so hard you're liable to split a seam," Jason teased, running a hand over his partner's considerable erection --to Tommy's obvious delight.
"The Red and White Rangers are gay?" Bulk gasped, thunderstruck, as he dropped back down behind the rocks, unable to watch. He glanced over at Skull, who was looking rather green around the gills. "No way, man. It can't be!"
The Rangers were still talking, but neither observer could bring himself to look.
"Please ...." Tommy moaned pleadingly.
"If our uniforms had flies, I'd take care of you with a quickie blowjob. You'll just have to wait until we're done at the Command Center."
"I don't think I can."
Bulk and Skull heard a sound like someone popping open buckles.
"What are they doing?" Bulk hissed, nudging Skull to take a peek.
"Why do I have to be the one to look?" Skull objected.
"Are you nuts?" Jason protested, his voice unusually deep and husky. "We're out in the open!"
"I'm desperate, man!"
The sudden silence tempted the would-be Ranger unmaskers to take a quick look. All they saw was the back of the Red Ranger's head and ....
"Oh God. They're kissing!" Bulk groaned as he sat down again.
"EW!" Skull winced.
"I don't feel so good, Skull."
"There's no one around," Tommy continued, almost growling. "Power down."
"We do that, we'll be out here butt naked!"
"That's just the way I want you."
"Bulkie," Skull ventured, his eyes tightly shut, "are they really going to take their uniforms off?"
"Don't be ridiculous! They wouldn't do that ...."
"Power down!"
"Oh God," Bulk swallowed hard. He and Skull traded terrified glances.
"Take it easy, man!" Jason rasped. "We don't have any lube."
"Then I guess I'll just have to stick my tongue up your ass!"
"Skull, I don't care if I never find out who the Power Rangers really are," Bulk declared, crawling away from the rocks. "Let's get out of here!"
"Another one bites the dust!" Zack crowed, sharing high fives with Trini and Billy as they and Kim settled down at their usual table in the Juice Bar.
"Where are Tommy and Jason?" Kim wondered, looking about the Youth Center for them.
"Maybe they got a little side tracked," Zack snorted, and Kim just scowled at him.
"Tommy was looking a little glassy-eyed before he and Jason left to go work out," Trini pointed out.
"It'd have been nice if he'd had said something to me," Kim grumbled, feeling left out. Tommy hadn't been home all that long, and the two of them had yet to have time for a good tumble.
"He may have had no choice," Billy reminded her.
"I know," Kim sighed.
"She's just poutin' cuz she's horny, too," Zack teased.
Just then, Bulk and Skull arrived at the Youth Center looking completely shell-shocked. They wandered over to a neighboring table and sat down without making so much as one obnoxious comment. The Rangers found their silence disturbing.
"I wonder what's wrong," Trini murmured.
"Yeah, they look like they're in shock or something," Kim noted.
"Hey guys, what's up?" Zack asked cheerfully as he bounded over to the next table.
"Are we sure we want to know?" Billy asked under his breath. Kim smiled, and Trini playfully swatted him.
"Oh man," Bulk mumbled numbly.
"It was awful," Skull stammered.
"What?" Zack pursued.
Bulk looked up at him with the most serious expression Zack had ever seen on his face. "I really don't think we should tell anybody," Bulk replied.
That got everyone's attention.
"This sounds serious," Billy remarked.
"It is, but you guys probably wouldn't believe us anyway."
"Bulk, if it's important, I think you should tell someone," Trini urged gently.
"Hey guys!" Tommy called out.
"What's up?" Jason asked as the two wandered over. Both were perplexed by the somber cloud hanging over the two tables. Their teammates motioned for them to be quiet.
"Well ...." Bulk hedged.
"Look, if you can't trust the `goody-two shoes squad' who can you trust?" Zack queried, dredging up one of Bulk's favorite epithets for the group.
The shaken pair exchanged looks.
"We think the Red Ranger and the new White Ranger are lovers," Bulk revealed reluctantly.
"What?"
"Are you sure?"
Amid the gasps of surprise, Jason and Tommy traded worried glances.
"We were at the beach ...."
"... looking for clues about the Power Rangers ...."
"I'm sure they figured that part out for themselves," Bulk grumbled. "Anyway, while we were there, we saw the Red and White Rangers fighting Goldar."
"We hid in the rocks so they couldn't see us," Skull interjected.
"Uh oh," Tommy mumbled softly. His friends caught his utterance and raised their eyebrows questioningly.
"The White one took this really nasty hit ...." Skull rambled on heedless of the looks being traded around the table.
"That wasn't the important part, you nitwit," Bulk snapped. "It's the stuff that happened after the fight that matters."
"What happened?" Jason gulped, trying to sound nonchalant.
"We saw them feeling each other up," Bulk answered, clearly upset to even be recounting what he saw.
"The red one said something about wishing their uniforms had flies so he could ...." Skull stammered.
"I think we can infer what his intentions were," Billy interjected, sparing the distraught nuisance from having to say it.
"They talked about powering down and ...."
"Whoa, this is serious, guys," Zack murmured, more to the others than Bulk and Skull.
"You mean you really believe us?" Skull queried in astonishment.
"Why?" Bulk wondered.
"In your present state of mental distress, your faculties are in no condition to fabricate and support such a scenario; ergo, you had to have witnessed something upon which to base your hypothesis," Billy replied, thinking quickly.
"Huh?"
"He means you're too wigged out to be able to make up something like this, so you had to have seen something," Zack translated.
"Are you guys sure about all this?" Jason asked, trying to find some way to salvage the situation.
"Did you see them power down?" Tommy asked nervously.
"Are you kidding? As soon as the White Ranger started talking about what he wanted to do with his tongue, we got out of there fast!"
Kim sputtered, nearly spitting out her soda; she covered her laugh with an exaggerated cough. "Sorry. Swallowed wrong," she said contritely.
"Do you guys really think they're gay?" Bulk wondered, very disturbed by the thought.
For a moment, no one knew what to say. Then, Trini spoke up.
"Would it really make a difference if they were?" she asked reasonably. "Their sexual preferences are their own business and have no bearing on their ability to defend Angel Grove from Lord Zedd and his monsters."
"You know, there's another explanation for all this," Zack offered.
"What else could possibly explain two guys kissing?" Bulk demanded.
"They could be under a spell."
"A spell?" the duo echoed.
Tommy and Jason pounced on the suggestion.
"Of course!"
"First Rita, then Zedd ...."
"They're always putting the Rangers under spells and making them do things they don't want to do."
"Like trashing the city and stuff," Skull exclaimed.
"A spell ...." Bulk reiterated thoughtfully. "You know, the White Ranger did say something about being hit with a second dose of something."
"There you go," Zack declared triumphantly.
"Skull, how could you jump to conclusions like that?" Bulk thundered. "I told you there had to be a rational explanation for all this."
"But ... but ... but ...."
"When that spell wears off, I bet the Red and White Rangers are going to be really embarrassed," Kim said, smirking at the twosome in question, who were still squirming in their seats.
"I'm sure the Rangers would be very grateful for our discretion," Billy proposed.
"Yeah, none of us should let it go past this table," Jason agreed.
"You can count on us," Bulk declared, sitting up straighter.
"Yeah, our lips our sealed," Skull added, pantomiming turning a key and tossing it away.
"We'd never do anything to ruin the Power Rangers' reputations," Bulk asserted.
"No? You only want to reveal their secret identities," Kim muttered.
"That's different. Come on, Skull. We have better things to do than gossip with the geekoids here."
"Like what?"
"Just come on, will you!" As Bulk dragged Skull behind him, he murmured, "A spell that makes two guys want to have sex with each other." He shuddered visibly.
"Kinda makes you glad you're not a Power Ranger," Skull added as the pair left the Juice Bar.
"All's well that ends well," Zack mused as he danced around to Jason and Tommy's side of the table. He leaned in close between them and said, "Busted!"
"I can't believe you two!" Kim said, whapping Tommy on the arm. "It would have served you right if Zack hadn't been able to save your butts!"
"I couldn't help it," Tommy protested.
"It's not like you've never experienced a hormone spike before," Trini chided.
"This was nothing like the Trips I had as the Green Ranger --not even my first one," Tommy explained. "It was like I had absolutely no control ...."
"Man, you got that right," Jason interrupted.
"It's never been this powerful before," Tommy continued.
"Of course," Billy exclaimed. "We should have anticipated this. Your White Ranger Powers are much stronger than your Green Ranger Powers; it follows, therefore, that the hormonal side effect would also be stronger."
"All right, Kim!" Zack snickered, giving her a wink and a nudge. She blushed and scowled at him.
"Well, there's no harm done this time," Tommy said. "Thanks for the great save, Zack."
"Yeah, Bulk and Skull's faith in the universe --such as it is-- has been restored," Jason sighed.
"This should be a lesson to all of us," Trini commented.
"We must be more circumspect in our actions while in uniform," Billy added.
"Yeah, no more P.D.H.," Zack chimed in.
"P.D.H.?" Kim queried, frowning.
"Public Displays of Horniness!"
Zordon chuckled as the images faded in the viewing globe. While this episode wasn't particularly erotic, it sure as hell was funny!