If Microsoft Built Cars...
- Every time they repainted the lines on the road, you'd have to buy
a new car.
- Occasionally your car would just die on the motorway for no reason.
Accept this, restart, and drive on.
- Occasionally, executing a maneuver would cause your car to stop and
fail to restart and you'd have to re-install the engine. For some strange
reason, you'd just accept this too.
- You could only have one person in the car at a time, unless you bought
a "Car 95" or a "Car NT". But then you'd have to buy more seats.
- Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was twice
as reliable, five times as fast, twice as easy to drive - but it would
only run on five percent of the roads.
- The Macintosh car owners would get expensive Microsoft upgrades to
their cars which would make their cars go much slower.
- The oil, engine, gas and alternator warning lights would be replaced
with a single "General Car Fault" warning light.
- People would get excited about the "new" features in Microsoft cars,
forgetting completely that they had been available in other cars for
- We'd all have to switch to Microsoft gas and all auto fluids but
the packaging would be superb.
- New seats would force everyone to have the same size butt.
- The airbag system would say "Are you sure?" before going off.
- If you were involved in a crash, you would have no idea what happened.
- They wouldn't build their own engines, but form a cartel with their
engine suppliers. The latest engine would have 16 cylinders, multi-point
fuel injection and 4 turbos, but it would be a side-valve design so
you could use Model-T Ford parts on it.
- There would be an "Engine Pro" with bigger turbos, but it would be
slower on most existing roads.
- Microsoft cars would have a special radio/cassette player which would
only be able to listen to Microsoft FM, and play Microsoft Cassettes.
Unless of course, you buy the upgrade to use existing stuff.
- Microsoft would do so well, because even though they don't own any
roads, all of the road manufacturers would give away Microsoft cars
free, including IBM!
- If you still ran old versions of car (ie. CarDOS 6.22/CarWIN 3.11),
then you would be called old fashioned, but you would be able to drive
much faster, and on more roads!
- If you couldn't afford to buy a new car, then you could just borrow
your friends, and then copy it.
- Whenever you bought a car, you would have to reorganize the ignition
for a few days before it worked.
- You would need to by an upgrade to run cars on a motorway next to