The Year's Best Actual Headlines

  1. Concorde Bodies Found, Eyes on Black Box
  2. Include Your Children When Baking Cookies
  3. Something Went Wrong In Jet Crash, Expert Says
  4. Police Begin Campaign To Run Down Jaywalkers
  5. Safety Experts Say School Bus Passengers Should Be Belted
  6. Drunk Gets Nine Months In Violin Case
  7. Survivor Of Siamese Twins Joins Parents
  8. Iraqi Head Seeks Arms
  9. Prostitutes Appeal To Pope
  10. Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over
  11. British Left Waffles On Falkland Islands
  12. Lung Cancer In Women Mushrooms
  13. Eye Drops Off Shelf
  14. Teachers Strike Idle Kids
  15. Clinton Wins On Budget, But More Lies Ahead
  16. Enraged Cow Injures Farmer With Ax
  17. Plane Too Close To Ground, Crash Probe Told
  18. Miners Refuse To Work After Death
  19. Juvenile Court To Try Shooting Defendant
  20. Stolen Painting Found By Tree
  21. Two Sisters Reunited After 18 Years In Checkout Counter 21.
  22. Killer Sentenced To Die For Second Time In 10 Years
  23. Never Withhold Herpes Infection From Loved One
  24. War Dims Hope For Peace
  25. If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last A While
  26. Cold Wave Linked To Temperatures
  27. Deer Kill 17,000
  28. Enfields Couple Slain, Police Suspect Homicide
  29. Red Tape Holds Up New Bridge
  30. Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead
  31. Man Struck By Lightening Faces Battery Charge
  32. New Study Of Obesity Looks For Larger Test Group
  33. Astronaut Takes Blame For Gas In Spacecraft
  34. Kids Make Nutritious Snacks
  35. Chef Throws His Heart In Helping Feed Needy
  36. Arson Suspect Held In Massachusetts Fire
  37. Ban On Soliciting Dead In Trotwood
  38. Local High School Dropout Cuts In Half
  39. New Vaccine May Contain Rabies
  40. Hospitals Are Sued By 7 Foot Doctors
  41. Christmas Trees Don't Grow On Trees
  42. Hemorrhoids Inspire Respectful Hindsight
  43. Stiff Opposition Expected To Casketless Funeral Plan
  44. Crime: Sheriff Asks For 13.7% Increase
  45. Woman Rents House But Complains About Corpse
  46. Cockroach Slain, Husband Badly Hurt
  47. Huang To Be Questioned In Suit
  48. Collegians Are Turning To Vegetables
  49. Queen Mary Having Bottom Scraped
  50. Police Discover Crack In Australia
  51. Storm Delayed By Bad Weather