Children's Books You Will Never See

  1. You Were an Accident
  2. Strangers Have the Best Candy
  3. The Little Sissy Who Snitched
  4. Some Kittens Can Fly!
  5. How to Dress Sexy for Grownups
  6. Getting More Chocolate on Your Face
  7. Where Would You Like to Be Buried?
  8. Katy Was So Bad Her Mom Stopped Loving Her
  9. The Attention Deficit Disorder Association's Book of Wild Animals of North Amer ... Hey! Let's Go Ride Our Bikes!
  10. All Dogs Go to Hell
  11. The Kids' Guide to Hitchhiking
  12. What Is That Dog Doing to That Other Dog?
  13. Bi-Curious George
  14. Daddy Drinks Because You Cry
  15. You Are Different and That's Bad
  16. Bob the Germ's Wonderous Journey Into and Back Out of Your Digestive System
  17. The Little Engine That Could Becomes Intoxicated and Kills Civillians
  18. Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer's Games of Revenge
  19. Peter Rabbit's Frisky Adventures
  20. Dick, Jane, and Spot Wander into The 'Hood'
  21. Clifford the Big Red Dog Accidently Eats his Masters and is Put to Sleep
  22. Valuable Protein and Other Nutritional Benefits of Things from Your Nose
  23. The Hardy Boys, the Barbie Twins, and the Vice Squad
  24. The Tickling Babysitter
  25. A Pictoral History of Circus Geek Suicides
  26. Charles Manson Bedtime Stories
  27. Daddy Loses His Job and Finds the Bottle
  28. Babar Meets the Taxedermist and Becomes a Piano
  29. Controlling the Playground: Respect through Fear
  30. David Duke's World of Imagination
  31. Curious George and the High-Voltage Fence
  32. The Boy Who Died from Eating All His Vegetables
  33. Legends of Scab Football
  34. Teddy: the Elf with the Detached Retina
  35. Tommy Tune: Boy Choreographer
  36. Joe Garagiola Retells Favorite Fairy Tales But Can't Remember the Endings to All of them
  37. Ed Beckley's Start a Real-Estate Empire With The Change From Your Mom's Purse
  38. The Pop-up Book of Human Anatomy
  39. Things Rich Kids Have, But You Never Will
  40. Let's Draw Betty and Veronica Without Their Clothes On
  41. The Care Bears Maul Some Campers and Are Shot Dead