You Might be An AOL Addict If....
- You walk into a room, and finding that it has more then 23 people,
you inform the management that there is an error.
- You find yourself tilting your head when you smile.
- Your AOL bill is more than your phone bill.
- When laughing, you find yourself saying "LOL" outloud.
- You get more e-mail than snail mail.
- When introducing yourself to anyone, you use your screen name.
- You understand what BIM, BIF, ISO, M4M, or F4F means.
- You are no longer afraid of a mouse.
- You're awake for a lot of sunrises.
- You are a male and see a female in the "real" world that you wish
to meet, your first thought is to IM her.
- You are a female and see a male in the "real" world that you wish
to meet, your first thought is that you wish he would IM you.
- You don't understand the humor in the above-mentioned item, since
the "real" world is not at your fingertips.
- When seeing someone you wish to meet, your second thought is wishing
they would be on AOL so you wouldn't have to meet them in person.
- When you have sex, you no longer are concerned about sexually transmitted
- You go up to people you are attracted to and ask for their GIF.
- Although you don't know what they look like, you become insanely
jealous of people that are hitting on your cyber-love.
- You don't even know what your cyber-love looks like.
- The only way that your child can get your attention is by: a) Standing
in front of your screen b) IM'ing you c) telling you that Steve Case
is calling you on the phone
- When your spouse is mad at you, they threaten to erase your e-mail,
and you humbly, earnestly, and quickly beg for forgiveness.
- When at work, your boss constantly reminds you that the letter "i"
should be capitalized.
- When going on a job interview and asked if you have any questions
about the company, your first response is to ask if they are on AOL.
- When looking at signs, you wonder why they're always yelling at you.
- When leaving to go to the bathroom, you find yourself saying, "BRB."
- When meeting a stranger, you ask for their profile. If they have
none, you ask for an age\sex\location check.
- Your spouse now complains of you moving your fingers in your sleep
instead of talking.
- You dream in text.
- Tech support calls YOU for help!
- You watch TV with the sound off and the close-captioning on.
- You double-click your remote.
- You beg your friends to go online so you can "hang out".
- You've gotten on a plane to meet someone face to face
- You've met over a 100 AOLers.
- You have over 100 people on your buddy list.
- You sign on and immediately get ten IMs from people that have you
on their buddy lists.
- You meet people face to face, and you don't know their real names.
- You've known people for years, and you don't know their real names.
- You've typed, "Drinking on AOL is better than drinking alone."
- You have a vanity tag with your screenname on it.
- You no longer use capital letter, proper punctuation, or complete
- You type over 70 WPM.
- You type faster than you think
- Three words: Carpal Tunnel Syndrome
- When someone asks, "What did you say?" You respond, "Scroll up!"
- You have an identity crisis when someone uses a screenname similar
- You change screennames so much that you have to check your profile
to figure out who you are.
- You've invited ten or more strangers to your house only because they
were cool online.
- You have a second line just for you computer.
- You type messages to people while you're speaking with on the phone
at the same time.
- You smile sideways.
- You spend at least 30 minutes making sure you say goodbye to everyone
before signing off.
- You bring a bag lunch to your computer.
- You go through AOL withdrawal during dinner.
- You wake up and your first instinct is to go online before having
a cup of coffee.
- You use AOL lingo in your "real" life (if you still have one)
- You stop using whole words like BRB, TTYL, dunno, gotta, etc...
- You got your psychiatrist addicted to AOL and are now undergoing
therapy in private rooms instead of his/her office.
- When you die, you want your computer buried with you -- or vice versa.
- Being called a "Newbie" is a MAJOR insult.
- There's absolutely no interesting chat in any room and you are really
bored -- yet you don't want to leave in case you miss something.
- You enjoy being called an AOL addict.
- You understand the humor in all of these jokes because you have committed